#SQUADGOALS (4)

By: Robert Wringham
January 25, 2017

One in a series of enthusiastic posts, contributed by HILOBROW friends and regulars during 2017, on the subject of our favorite squads.

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A self-appointed leader. A diffident first mate. A brave senior. A coddled mummy’s boy. A resourceful spiv. A frugal doomcryer. A wistful romantic. Yes, my ideal squad is the home guard of Dad’s Army (BBC, 1968–1977), the cheerful sitcom with the swastikas in the opening titles. In truth, my posse has always resembled the brave souls of Walmington-on-Sea in both spirit and lineup, from the knock-kneed childhood gang you can read about in A Loose Egg to the various creative teams I’m with today. The resemblance is partly due to the inevitable presence of a daft mustache, a home-knitted scarf and an elderly Scotsman, but it’s really more to do with a certain makeshift resourcefulness and a Don Quixote-like, Rembrandt’s-”Nightwatch”-esque spirit. I’ve never wanted to be part of a well-oiled, super-funded elite. I don’t want to be in the X Men or Storm Watch, looking down on the Earth from a weaponised, NATO-funded space station. I’m happier as part of the domestic second wave, jiggering the enemy machine with little more than a paint-spattered bradawl and a cheese sandwich. Payday is the moment when a so-called Great Leader must pause to scratch her head in bewilderment. It’s all about the ability to improvise and keeping things human-sized. Who can get excited about NASA when there’s a tin-can backyard space programme putting LEGO men in the sky? As with the home guard, our HQ is usually on tentative lease from some nuisance antagonist. For Captain Mainwaring it’s a church hall requisitioned from the vicar for the war effort; with us it’s usually a neighbour’s shed, a corner of an arts centre, or the squelchy room above a pub. “What are you doing in there,” they all shout. Why, essential routine drill of course.

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#SQUADGOALS: Annie Nocenti on THE WILD BUNCH | Alice Boone on PRETTY LITTLE LIARS | Gordon Dahlquist on BOWIE’S BAND | Rob Wringham on THE HOME GUARD | Jennifer Krasinski on WATERSHIP DOWN RABBITS | Annalee Newitz on ROBIN HOOD’S MERRY PALS | Adrienne Crew on THE BLOOMSBURY GROUP | Mark Kingwell on THE HONG KONG CAVALIERS | Adam McGovern on KAMANDI’S FAMILY | John Overholt on THE CLUB | Greg Rowland on THE VULTURE SQUADRON | Sara Ryan on BETSY, TACY & TIB | Chelsey Johnson on VI ÄR BÄST! | Brian Berger on THE JOHN FORD STOCK COMPANY | Sherri Wasserman on THE WARRIORS | Jessamyn West on FAREYNIKTE PARTIZANER ORGANIZATSYE | Josh Glenn on DADA | Matthew De Abaitua on THE TIME | Mandy Keifetz on THE FOUNDING FATHERS | William Nericcio on ZOOT SUIT PACHUCOS | Deb Chachra on FIREFLY CREW | Matthew Battles on THE ANIMAL FAMILY | Ingrid Schorr on THE HARLEM GLOBETROTTERS | Joe Alterio on THE USUAL GANG OF IDIOTS | Dan Reines on THE BREAKFAST CLUB | Rob Walker on LES TROIS INSÉPARABLES | Devin McKinney on 1975 RED SOX | Steph Burt on DAMAGE CONTROL | Elina Shatkin on THE HOLOGRAMS | Chris Spurgeon on THE ALKALI METALS | Carl Wilson on NEW YORK SCHOOL POETS | Barbara Bogaev on THE MOD SQUAD | Franklin Bruno on THE AACM | Judith Zissman on THE FUTURIANS | Mimi Zeiger on ARCHIGRAM | Jacob Mikanowski on THE RATBASTARDS | Lynn Peril on THE DALY SISTERS | Anindita Basu Sempere on MEG MURRY’S FAMILY | Libi Rose on THE ENIAC TEAM | Gary Panter on THE TRIBE OF HIPPIES | Peter Doyle on CORNEL WILDE BOYS | Ken Layne on THE MONKEY WRENCH GANG | Molly Wright Steenson on BAUHAUS | Katie Hennessey on BEAT POETS | Mimi Lipson on THE RUNAWAYS | Jordan Ellenberg on BOURBAKI | Michael Campochiaro on THE SUICIDE SQUAD | Deborah Wassertzug on THE BLOODHOUND GANG | Colin Dickey on ACÉPHALE | Douglas Wolk on SEVEN SOLDIERS OF VICTORY | David Smay on THE MYSTIC KNIGHTS OF THE OINGO BOINGO | Karinne Keithley Syers on BLACKLIPS PERFORMANCE CULT.

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